Native Family

 

I’ve just returned from a visit with my native family. They are native as in my first people – the ones who raised me and were raised with me. These are the people with whom I built my deepest fears. Fears like, “What if I am not loved? What if I am not good?” They are also the people who taught be to love and be loved. They are the ones with whom I developed my strongest attachments – some healthy, some not so healthy.



Over the years we have all made many mistakes together, and our patterns of behavior fit together like puzzle pieces. My tendency to swallow my words molded itself perfectly around my brother’s childhood bravado; my desperation to be admired and respected grew right alongside the skeptical looks my little sisters gave me when I tried new things. 

No matter what kind of family, every single one of us is molded by the shapes our loved ones took as we grew up together.

 

 

As we navigate our spiritual paths as adults, it can be tempting to imagine that we can think our way out of those childhood limitations.  It can be tempting to expect that we will take our enlightened spirituality into our family visits and somehow make those relationships work perfectly.  But those old puzzle pieces still fit together, so that when I visit, I find I am not myself. I say things I would never usually say. I feel things more strongly than I usually feel. And I struggle to keep my center more than in any other situation in my adult life.

I know I’m not the only one who feels this way. We all know that family relationships can be complicated and confusing. Yet these are the people we keep going back to, because amidst all that confusion there is a deep and profound potential for love. After all, if this is the place we learned our greatest fears, just imagine what could happen if we heal our fears in those very relationships where they started?



Luckily, I ended the trip with a clarifying visit to Grand Teton National Park. There are few places that clear my mind and set my senses soaring as much as the high mountains of the Rockies and Great Basin.

Beautiful!

Grounding Food

Because I spend a lot of time channeling the Akashic Records, I can become pretty ungrounded if I’m not careful.  Sometimes, after doing a few consultations, I think I’m fine until I need to remember my phone number and realize I can’t. Or I find myself emptying dirty dishes from the dishwasher without realizing until I’m halfway through. If I’m not careful, it starts to feel normal to be a little spaced out. And I’ve learned the hard way that walking through life like a space cadet means I miss out on a lot of important stuff. (Here's a web page that does a great job explaining what it means to be grounded.)

Luckily I’ve developed some tools to keep me grounded on the days I’m doing channeling work. Some of the healthier ones include deep breathing exercises, walking barefoot in the grass when it’s warm outside, and quick yoga sessions between appointments. And always drinking lots of water.

But sometimes I’m not quite organized enough to do those healthy routines. So I take a shortcut. My favorite shortcut? Food. Salty, greasy food.


Don’t get me wrong – I do eat my share of solid meals that are organic and healthy. But in the moments following a channeling, when I just don’t have it in me to cook or lay out my yoga mat, I go for the not-so-good stuff.

If I can spare more than five minutes, I boil edamame with lots of salt.  Not bad for a five minute fix.

But sometimes I feel like I can't wait longer than 25 seconds, so I go for Lay’s potato chips. Not the organic kind, not even the baked kind – I head straight for the original, saltiest-greasiest things I’ve ever found. And they work like a charm.





And, yes, I realize this is my second food confession in the last couple of weeks. (See Girl Scout Cookies, below.) What can I say? I’m only human.

Over the years I’ve asked people what they do to get their energy grounded after doing spiritual work. It’s amazing how many ways there are to get grounded. I’ve heard about headstands, touching houseplants, and imagining a cable connecting you with the core of the Earth. Some people use crystals, talismans, leather, stones, and other materials to help anchor their energy.

I’ve heard from some lucky people in warm climates that jump into the salty ocean. The nearest I can come to that in Seattle is an Epsom salt bath, which is great when I have the time, or when really deep grounding is needed.

I’ve met one person who rubs his feet with garlic. I've also heard from someone who walks in mud then keeps the mud under her socks all day. I trust that there is a perfect way for each of us, and it’s up us to listen to our bodies and follow our instincts to determine what works best. Sometimes I see a tendency in the New Age movement to get ungrounded and stay ungrounded. It might feel great to float through life, but I think we miss out on the magic of being human which includes really feeling our bodies and our emotions. We incarnated here for a reason, right?

So take some deep breaths, eat something healthy, and notice what you’re feeling. Or, if you're in a pinch, try something salty. Being grounded in our bodies is a beautiful thing!